“So when you look at me
You better look hard and look twice
Is that me baby
Or just a brilliant disguise?” Bruce Springstien
Social media makes it really easy to present a different and more polished version of yourself. Camera and online filters allow the blemishes to be covered, and typically only smiles and dreamy vacation sites are what we see of our family and friends. But more than what is being posted online, I worry more about what version of ourselves is being presented day in and day out.
I had dinner with a family several months ago, and when the front door opened, the wife smiled and said loudly, “Fr. Michael, it is so good to see you! How have you been? So glad you can join us this evening!” My impression was this woman was actually more of an introvert who was somewhat forcing this extroverted effort, so I gently brought up this topic during dinner. She said, “Fr. Michael, it’s funny you bring up our the topic of our true identity. I feel that I am more of an introvert, but this town wants you to be outgoing and extroverted. I find it so draining and exhausting at times!” I told her, “Be who you are! If you are more soft spoken and gentle, that is what people will actually appreciate about you. No need to put on a show!”
Societal pressures want us to look and act a “certain” way. Things we should and should not talk about, superficial topics that people expect to discuss like the weather, politics, sports, etc…and even when we do discuss the Catholic Church or our Catholic Faith, we often go with what the media dictates on gay marriage, birth control and other hot button issues. Do you ever express how you really feel or how you really think about a particular topic?? Do you talk about things that matter to you personally?
The real challenge is to be authentically “good” people. Are we winning the battle of our inner thoughts, our inner passions and desires, our judgements of others? Although we naturally project goodness in our relations with others; how is our heart? Are we at peace with ourselves and with God? “Man looks at appearances, but God looks at the heart.” If we take care of our hearts, and lean into God for help, we will not feel this inner duplicity which weighs so heavily on so many people today. Then there will be no need for a “brilliant disguise” or mask; your authentic Christian center will naturally shine out from within and you will inspire others to walk this path of genuine goodness.
